It's simple: either you care about validation, and you must validate everything, or you don't, and you don't validate anything.

Pedantically: you could validate a random subset of all scripts, to give yourself probabilistic verification rather than full vs SPV. If enough people do it with a large enough subset the probability of a problem being detected goes up a lot. You still pay the cost of the database updates.

But your main point is of course completely right, that side chains are not a way to scale up.